How Should I Present Myself On The First Date – Attractive Behaviours of Women on A First Date

First dates are exciting. The mystery of how your date is going to be like is sending butterflies into your stomach. At the same time, you are probably also wondering, ‘how should I present myself on the first date?’ Well the fact that you’re going out with this guy shows that you are attracted to him – so I guess you probably won’t want to mess this up right? You will do just fine by following these tips I’m about to share with you.

Having dated several times before I got engaged, I’ve been to quite a number of ‘first dates’. Needless to say, there were good and bad experiences and along the way, I took note of what kind of behaviour is attractive to a man and what is not. The key is to So let me share them with you.

Attractive Behaviour of Women on A First Date:

  1. Participate in the conversation. What a man likes is to be heard. He will feel that what he is saying isn’t boring you and it gives him a HUGE confidence boost. So, respond to his comments and or questions about the topic the both of you are on and if you are not familiar with the topic, ask him about it! It will give him more things to talk about and you won’t have to be afraid of the situation where there are awkward silences.
  2. Be enthusiastic but not overly enthusiastic. Being enthusiastic during first dates is always a plus point. For example, if the man suggests catching a movie after the meal, go ahead with it. And since he’s decided the program, you have the choice of movie. However, if you’re really tired after a long day provide him with an alternative and let him know that you’re tired – being honest about what you want and feel is essential for a healthy relationship.
  3. Dress up according to the occasion. This is one of the most crucial tip on how you should present yourself on the first date. You see, men are visual beings. The first thing he will take note when you arrive at the date is your physical appearance. It will indicate to him how much you want to have this date with him and if he sense that you aren’t, there is a very high chance that this date may not work out. So, dress according to the occasion and if you aren’t sure what to wear, ask your girlfriends to help you.

Ten Fun Ways to Liven Up Any Presentation

Most of us would agree that having humor in our lives increases rapport, strengthens our relationships and overcomes communication barriers. People who work in a positive, often playful environment are more likely to stay. Productivity and creativity increase while stress is reduced. We just feel better after a good laugh. Think funny!

1. Open with a humorous story.. I remember the time the lights when out and I fell off the stage. I wasn’t hurt and quickly said, Now I will take questions from the floor. I’m at my best when taking questions in the dark. Before you can be funny, you must learn to see funny. Find the humor around you, in your life every day. The lady who takes an aisle seat rather tan sit next to the window… doesn’t want to mess up her hair. Practice telling the story out loud, and cut out any parts that aren’t crucial. As Shakespeare so wisely said, “Brevity is the soul of wit.”

2. Use props (candy bars, hats, funny faces, etc.) Props can be used as a metaphor or an analogy for a point you are introducing. They get your creative juices working while providing an anchor for your audience to focus on.

3. Cartoons use your own or others a picture saves a 1000 words. Put cartoons on an overhead or use as part of a PowerPoint presentation.

4. Humor – should be relevant to your topic. Tom Peters said, I deeply believe in humor; not in jokes. Humor is spectacular. Humor relieves anxiety and tension, serves as outlet for hostility and anger, and provides a healthy escape from reality. It lightens heaviness related to critical illness, trauma, disfigurement, and death. It comes as no surprise that many people are utilizing humor to deal with the trying times. But is the humor timely? Is it appropriate?

Do not use ethnic, racist, political or religious jokes. Include a joke that helps bring back the attention of the audience or as a way to lighten up your remarks. We all can use a good laugh from a well timed, funny joke.

5. Self effacing humor- it is better to admit you made a mistake than to admit that you are one. One of my lines as a mother of five is: For someone who isn’t Catholic, I sure did my share for the pope! Phyllis Diller is in the Guinness Book of World Records as having the most laughs per minute. A laugh is measured by:

5 points if everyone is laughing and applauding
-4 points if everyone is laughing and there’s a smattering of applause
-3 points if everyone laughs but there’s no applause
-2 points if some people are laughing
-1 point for a titter or giggle

6. Mime- Marcel Marceau makes us laugh and moves us. Charlie Chaplin was an all time great without using the spoken word.

7. Move Your Body -Try lifting your nose, look off to the side, jut out the bottom of your jaw, and notice how you become arrogant or aloof, Take a wide stance, shift your hips forward, and now you’ve just gained 50 pounds. The use of body movements will help to visually enhance your remarks.

8. Repetitive oral recitation- (repeat after me, Remember, if you can see funny, you can be funny. Repeat a particular sentence throughout your presentation to encourage audience retention.

9. Use taped music for a stretch break. Get the audience to sing a funny song. Pass out words to a song. Lighten up your attendees have some fun and your audience retention will increase. Don’t be afraid to be theatrical or silly. It’s why we pay actors the big bucks; and your audiences won’t forget you. Be outrageous. It’s the only place that isn’t crowded.

10. Group exercise a fun way to conclude your presentation is to use a group exercise. Use the football huddle to get the group to repeat a cheer or an affirmation to take some action.

Hatred Remarks by Channel S Presenter, Apology and Social Implications

Racially motivated hate speech should be taken seriously. Any statement that is made by anyone in the society that intends to insult, degrade, intimidate, create anger or incite violence against someone based on religion, ethnicity, race, gender, origin of country or regional identity or any other forms is dangerous and harmful should be a matter of grave concern. Anti-religious prejudice, malicious intent of dehumanising others is not only illegal but can create huge social unrest and even violence. Such act should be avoided by anyone and as such should be condemned by the society without any reservations or personal interest. This is not only insult to the victim, individual, group, or the community but to the entire society and humanity.

This has happened recently in the Bangladeshi Community in the UK. Channel S TV presenter and founder of the same channel, Mahee Ferdous Jalil made such inflammatory comments on the programme “COVID-19″ that was live between 12 noon and 2.00 pm on channel on the 3rd May 2020. The derogatory and highly offensive remarks that were made have created a huge outcry among Hindu communities and others in the UK. Immediately, it went viral in various social media channels and people have expressed their condemnation. Local political and community leaders were informed. Multiple petitions have been launched and a serious community movement against this hate crime has been galvanised. A number of official statements were issued by the local Mayor and the Member of Parliament, with both John Biggs, Mayor of Tower Hamlets and Rushanara Ali have issued powerful condemnations of the racist comments made about Hindus, stating that the remarks were disgraceful and derogatory. Mr Biggs demands an unconditional apology and further asserts that such “disrespect and religious prejudice” has no place in community. Tower Hamlets has the highest Bangladeshi population in the UK and become the largest ethnic group with over 81,000 (according to last census) making up 32% of the population.

What Mr Jalil said? (The programme was aired in Bengali; the key message is translated in English below).

“Muslims who came to the UK from Bangladesh have inherited the low, impure and heinous blood of Hindus causing problems in the community. Due to the inherited blood of Hindus, Muslim shopkeepers cheat their customers—-”.

We are living in a free society in which freedom of expression is well protected and respected. The capacity of everyone to express their individual views are always respected and should not be threatened. Article 10 9Equality and Human Rights commission in the UK) focuses on the freedom of expression that protects individual right to hold their personal opinion and express them freely without fear or any interference from government or regulatory bodies. However, if personal views encourage religious or racial hatred or if it is dehumanising or derogatory, in which case the authorities can restrict that freedom of expression and such comments or views can be viewed as unlawful. Free debate, good actions, convincing arguments are important to counter hatred. Civil society, society at large and Governments should condemn hatred, or that which might fosters hatred and set the right examples by bringing those behind such conduct to justice. There is certainly no room in this world for odious and mendacious comments that have at their heart prejudices or twisted notions of those who may be different or hold different beliefs.

Mr Jalil finally apologised. Channel S also issued an official statement of unreserved apology on the 9th May and asking for forgiveness for the comment’s TV presenter made that may have caused distress. There was no “may” about it, the comments were deeply offensive and have hurt and alarmed a lot of people.

Is apology enough to heal the community? Was the apology done in most effective and sincere way?

It is not good enough just to convey apology or say sorry. As sometimes some apologies are insincere; and are often driven by ulterior motives such as fear of public censure or loss of business. It is logical that people will not forgive someone until they receive an apology and that should be unreserved and with remorse. Inability to convey apology correctly when it is legitimate indicates the dysfunctional life of an individual. An appropriate apology is paramount to heal the emotional and physical wellbeing of the victim. The right apology has the great power to transform both the individual who made the intentional or unintentional comments that hurt, degraded, or angered others. However, such apology should come with sincerity and remorse. Some are quite legitimately wondering whether Mr Jalil’s apology was said with true contrition. An apology like gratitude, appreciation or kindness has profound impact on an individual and society and can transform the world if it is done at the right ways, at the right time and right place. An effective apology validate that the person realised that a wrong act has been committed for which he/she has showing his/her regret or remorse and the person is committed not to do the same wrongful act in future and offer for repairs. Realisation, remorse, restoration, and request for forgiveness are some of the key elements of an unreserved apology and seeking for forgiveness.

It is sad to observer that community is not always working unitedly. People have different agendas and individual interest. Therefore, many such crimes never get the right justice and the punishment and hence, as a society we do not get the best outcome. I am sure over time this also will be deemed yesterday’s news and people will forget about this. Community become fragmented and divided, and sadly at times put profit over principle. Regrettably, those who want to ensure matters are properly resolved often see matters superseded by others pursuing their own interests. Sadly, as a consequence society is the loser.

Why society cannot be united for a common goal?

It reminds me the next quote: “What does it profit a man, if he gains the whole world and loses soul? (Mark 8.36)

This quote helped us to revisit the world social order and humans’ attitude. I am compelled to recall a salient truth in Gandhi’s observation “Earth provides enough to satisfy every man’s need, but not for every man’s greed”. We are living in a society of intoxication that is based on estimation, quantification of humans. Maximisation of wealth is becoming the theory of normality, an accepted mantra. This has become the norm of the society. In 1973 E. F Schumacher published his one of the most influential books on earth titled “Small is beautiful… “. He realised that if the current form of economic, technological, and scientific specialisation is not replaced by a simple form of economic system then the world will face a boundless and endless misery. Now we see the outcome of his prediction.

Society is too much greedy. We all are running after profit and wealth maximisation. To do this, crime, dishonesty, bribery, multiple dishonest and unethical relationships, falsification, fabrication, unethical acts all are acceptable norms. We do not want to ask, we all are here to enjoy, increase our pleasure, increase status and attention from others. This is the degradation of human values and morality. The loss of soul is the loss of peace and happiness. If we lose it, we accept misery what is happening now in our society. If we neglect our soul than loss is inevitable.

A wrong is a wrong

If there is one lesson that we must all learn from this most unhappy of episodes is that we cannot be sectarian about grievous wrongs and injustices. A wrong is a wrong regardless of who it comes from. If we choose to stay silent about it there is always the danger that we give the impression of our tacit approval. We need to speak out, if necessary, to censure members of our own community, for like a child, if we never tell them when they have done wrong how will they ever learn. It is essential that we use temperate language and be measured in our approach. A person can express their hurt, displeasure or indeed anger, without having recourse to threats and abuse. Each of us must strive to behave with dignity and mutual respect. Slanderous, libellous, or highly offensive comments warrant prompt and decisive action. We all need to work assiduously for a kinder and more respectful world.